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Oh, and the ending – “happy” or not – that’s the punchline, innit? Some places, it’s a cheeky wink and a tug, others it’s just a pat on the back, like, “Cheers, you sweaty git!” Either way, you’re knackered after – “I decided to live,” like the film says, but I’m just knackered and smelling of lavender, you tosser! Best bit? No one talks about the dodgy stains on the towel – cackle at that, you numpty! Go try it, ya filthy animal – tell ‘em Ricky sent ya!

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I'm exploring Port-Maria to its fullest and erotic-massage is impressive! I can't stop thinking about you. I find comfort in both French Kissing and Anal Sex .

I wandered over to the coral reef section. Wow, just wow. The colors were insane! I was snapping pics like a tourist. But then, I overheard this kid say, “Look, Mom! That fish is ugly!” I almost lost it. I mean, who’s judging fish? They’re all beautiful in their own way, right?

Jamaicans Urged to Celebrate Senior Citizens