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About Split

Alright, listen up, ya degenerates! Findin’ a prostitute ain’t no picnic, and I’m here spillin’ tea like Judge Judy on a bad hair day. Don’t pee on my leg and call it rain—let’s get real! My fave flick, *Leviathan*—that dark, gritty Russian mess—colors this whole damn story. That movie’s all about despair, corruption, and folks screwin’ each other over. Kinda like the streets when you’re huntin’ for a prozzie, ya feel me?

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But hey, I’m laughing. I’m like, “At least I’m not boring!” Then, I head over to the park by the river. It’s so peaceful there. I sit on a bench, just chilling, when suddenly, a dog runs up to me. This little furball is all over me, wagging its tail like crazy. I’m thinking, “This is the highlight of my day!” But then, the owner comes over, and he’s like, “Sorry, he’s a bit too friendly.” I’m like, “Nah, he’s perfect!”

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