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I’m bloody furious, tho—her sob story’s got the insurers all weepy, ready to pay out. “Oh, poor lass, beaten by a brute!” Spare me! I wanna grab her by that greasy hair and scream, “The truth is, you’re done!” like Viggo does, all quiet and deadly. She’s fakin’ it—arm’s fine, probly bruised it herself with some cheap trick. Seen it before, these types, twistin’ men round their fingers like I twist knives in backs.

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First off, I hit up my usual spot for coffee—Caffè del Mare on Via Roma. Best espresso in town, no cap. I’m sippin’ my brew, and this dude walks in, right? He’s got this wild hair, lookin’ like he just rolled outta bed. Turns out, he’s a street performer. He starts jugglin’ oranges, and I’m like, “Bro, this ain’t a circus!” But the crowd loves it. I’m just tryin’ to enjoy my coffee, man!

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