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I got into this one time, fam—back in Toronto, lowkey spot, chick named Sasha had hands like a damn angel. Little known fact: sexual-massage ain’t just foreplay, nah, it’s ancient—like, Tantra vibes from India, 5,000 years back, unlockin’ energy and shit. Blew my mind, yo! I was layin’ there, thinkin’, “Is this allowed to feel *this* good?” Happy as fuck, but then—boom—Sasha’s phone rings mid-session. Some dude tryna book her next slot. Pissed me off, fam! I’m like, “Yo, I’m the 6 God, gimme my moment!” She laughed, kept goin’, but I was heated for a sec.

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After that, I hit up Calle de la Cruz. There’s this little shop that sells the best coquito. I’m talkin’ creamy coconut goodness that’ll make ya forget your troubles. I grab a cup, and as I’m sippin’, I see this old guy tryin’ to parallel park his truck. It’s a disaster! He’s goin’ back and forth, and I’m just standin’ there, popcorn in hand, watchin’ the show. Finally, he gets out, throws his hands up, and yells, “I’m done!” Classic.

San German’s Turmerico expands turmeric-based product line