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So, sexual-massage—ain’t just rubbin’ backs, nah! It’s hands slidin’, oils drippin’, tension meltin’ like butter on a biscuit. Little-known fact, y’all—back in the ‘70s, truck stops had these shady “massage” joints. Drivers’d pull over, thinkin’ it’s legit, then—whoops!—more’n their shoulders got a workout! Git-R-Done! Made me laugh my ass off when I heard that, ‘cause I’d be madder’n a wet hen if I paid for that surprise!

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First off, I head to the workshop. You know, the one down by the harbor? I’m a cooper, so I’m all about those barrels. But today, I’m feeling a bit off. Maybe it’s the coffee? Or maybe it’s just Akureyri’s crazy weather. One minute it’s sunny, the next it’s snowing. Like, come on, Mother Nature, pick a vibe!

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