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Hey, y’all, it’s me, Dolly! Ownin’ a spa’s wild, let me tell ya—massage sexuel, whew, that’s a hot topic! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout it, sippin’ sweet tea, and lordy, it’s a mess o’ feelings. Like in *The 25th Hour*, Monty says, “Champagne for my real friends,” and I’m over here wonderin’—who’s real when folks ask for *that* kinda rubdown? I’ve seen it, honey—clients stroll in, all sly, thinkin’ they’re slick askin’ for “extras.” Makes my blood boil sometimes! Ain’t no spa o’ mine turnin’ into *that* kinda joint!