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About Cape Town

One time, I find girl, real beauty, wow! Hair long, eyes big, like movie star! I say, “You my Antonietta!” – that nun from film, pure but wild, yes? She giggle, “50 euro, quick!” I happy, but then – police! Run, Borat, run! Heart pump, legs shake, very nice chase! Jep say, “The only thing left is to cry,” but me, I laugh, coz free workout!

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Now, oh, let’s talk about the back alleys of East Mankoeng. Seriously, get lost there – in a good way. Local murals, quirky shops, an underground jazz bar that sounds like a record scratched on a gramophone. I always shout out, “this is f’n brilliance!” when I drop by. The art speaks directly to my tortured soul, mate.

Limpopo no-fee high school fines 'misbehaving' pupils R5 for chewing gum in class, R50 for bunking