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I’m sittin’ there, watchin’ her, thinkin’, “Goddammit, why’s she gotta be so loud?!” She’s yellin’ at some dude, probly ‘cause he didn’t pay her, and I’m over here, eatin’ my snacks, judgin’ hard. She’s a freakin’ tornado of trashy drama—love to hate her, ya know? Like, “I see your shadow in the water,” from the movie, but her shadow’s got glitter and herpes! Hella nasty, but I can’t look away—it’s like a trainwreck, dude!

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Oh, I almost forgot! There's Veterans Park near Pine Street. Super chill spot where I spill my secrets to gulls—okay, not literally but you get it. This park reminds me of those absurd little moments in the movie where every detail’s a character in its own quirky tale. I sometimes wander there and imagine that quirky concierge whispering off to me about secret lobby talks. Crazy, right?

Dozens appear before Waukegan council in appeal to reopen sports bar