Elizabeth Cushing Find A Prostitute ❤️❤️

About Houston

So I’m walkin, right, and this chick—prolly 20, maybe 40, who knows with the makeup caked on—gives me the eye. I’m like, “Honey, I ain’t buyin what you’re sellin less I know the deal.” She smirks, all sassy, and I’m thinkin, *damn, this is some real-life cinema*. Godard’s voice in my head: “The image is a prison.” Ain’t that the truth? She’s trapped, I’m trapped, we’re all stuck starin at each other like idiots. I ask her name—Crystal, she says. Yeah, sure, “Crystal”—prolly Susan from Ohio, but whatever, I roll with it.

Departments

Arrest Log ; Williams, Dustin Gene: W/M 43 years old; ; Herweck, Teddy Ray Jr: W/M 49 years old; ; Reese, Jason Randal: W/M

I swear, my line of work makes me appreciate the small things. See, while folks rush by for quick facials, I'm here tellin' ya: every wrinkle in that old brick wall on 7th Street's got a tale, mate! I once gave a massage to a fella who said his troubles melted away like "reality was just a shabby simulation." I laughed and mumbled, "Sharon!" 'cause, well, life's absurd, innit?

Amy Schumer credits internet trolling with diagnosing Cushing's syndrome