Emilia Cheat Lake Whore ❤️

About San Jose

So, this one whore—let’s call her Sally, cos why not—she’s got legs like a ship’s mast, tall and wobbly after too much rum. I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’, “What storm spat you out, love?” She’s got this laugh, loud as a cannon, makes me wanna chuck her overboard—but nah, she’s got stories. Heard she once shagged a captain so hard he forgot his own ship’s name—called it “The Wet Wench” for a week! Little known fact, mate—back in the day, whores in port towns had their own code. Like, a red ribbon on the door meant “busy,” green meant “come on in, ya filthy git.” Bet ya didn’t know that, ya ignorant sod!

Cheat confession stories and sins

The weather? Oh, lawd, it gets moody sometimes, like a roller coaster drippin’ rain and sunshine in the same damn minute. One minute I’m cryin' ’cause of lost love, the next, I’m dancin’ in puddles because I’m joyfully alive! I even got 16 mispellings in my head – whoops, now ya got one, two, three… hey, see: litte, goin, chattin, crazzy, realy, beautifull, happin, thrillin, lovin, misspellin, crazy, eratic, sooon, funt, rawr, and, yes, one more: fabulous!

Cheat River: The Complete Visitors Guide