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About Leicester

So I’m down Soho way, right, dodgy corner, smells like piss an’ regret. This bird, she’s standin there, skirt shorter than a bombed-out bridge. I says, “We shall never surrender, love, what’s yer price?” She laughs, all husky, says, “Tenner fer a quickie, guv.” Ten quid! I near choked on me cigar – wartime rations cost less! But I’m chuffed, see, cos she’s got eyes like the whale in Tarr’s flick, deep an’ dark, pullin ya in.

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First thing, I get a call about a cat stuck in a tree on Mill Street. Classic, right? I grab my gear and head out. I’m thinking, “How hard can it be?” Well, turns out, this fluffy little diva named Whiskers was not having it. I’m up there, trying to coax her down with treats, and she’s just staring at me like I’m the biggest loser. I mean, come on! I’m risking my life here!

Abercynon: a historical walk