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Ay! Respect my authoritah! So, findin’ a prostitute, huh? Man, I’m pissed already! This world’s goin’ to crap, like in *Melancholia*—you know, that flick where Kirsten Dunst just stares at the damn planet crashin’ down? “I know things,” she says, all gloomy. Well, I know stuff too, assholes! Like, did ya know back in old Rome, hookers wore blonde wigs to stand out? Freakin’ wild, right?

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Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a barista in Stari-Kuty is like riding a rollercoaster blindfolded. So, I roll into work at my little café on Shevchenka Street, right? The sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m thinkin’, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill.