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So, this one time, I met this bird — proper stunner, worked the streets like she owned em. Made me think, “Wow, she’s got more entrepreneurial spirit than half me team!” Swear down, she coulda run Slough branch with that hustle. Got me happy as Larry, seein someone own their patch like that. But then — bam! — some punter stiffed her on cash. Got me ragin, fumin, cos where’s the bloody honor, eh? “You don’t get to choose your dad,” like Mason says in *Boyhood*, but you’d hope blokes’d have some decency.

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Finally, the event wraps up. I’m exhausted but kinda happy. I mean, I made people laugh, right? That’s a win in my book. I head out to the waterfront on the Danube. The sunset is gorgeous, and I’m just standing there, soaking it all in.

Russian drone strike hits Danube port of Izmail, wounds three, Ukraine says