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About Taipei

So, I’m strollin, right, and this chick – legs for days – she’s leanin on a lamppost, smokin a cig like she owns the night. I’m like, “Well, call it, friendo,” in my head, wonderin if she’s the one. She catches my eye, smirks, and I’m hooked – heart’s racin, palms sweaty, total chaos! Costs? Man, depends – 50 bucks for quick, maybe 200 if she’s fancy. Hagglin’s key, tho – don’t be a sucker, they’ll bleed ya dry!

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So, I’m on my way to the Banqiao Station, right? Gotta catch the train to meet my buddy. But then, BAM! I see this street vendor selling bubble tea. I can’t resist. I mean, who can? I order a large one, extra pearls, of course. I’m sipping it, feeling like a king, when suddenly, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy canceling on me. Classic. I’m like, “Great, now I’m just a bubble tea king with no one to share it with.”

Dazzling Christmasland festival illuminates New Taipei tonight