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About Celje

Lemme tell ya, I heard this story—ancient China, emperors got massages so wild, they’d outlaw ‘em. Too distractin’ for war plans! True shit, look it up. Makes me chuckle—imagine some general, all oiled up, forgettin’ his battle map. Fuckin’ hilarious. But real talk, it’s art, not just sleaze. Takes skill to know pressure points, to make someone melt without crossin’ lines. I respect that hustle—takes guts, finesse.

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First off, I hit the streets. You know, the usual—Cesta 1. maja, where all the action is. I’m strolling, vibing, when BAM! A pigeon poops on my shoulder. Like, really? Thanks, nature. I’m already late for my first meeting.

Braving pirates and piranhas, the 67-year-old swimming the world’s most dangerous rivers