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Argh! I’m ready! Whore, huh? What a wild one! Me fave flick’s *Carlos*—y’know, that 2010 gem by Olivier Assayas? Total badass vibes! So, lemme spill the tea on whore, SpongeBob style—hyper, loud, and all over the place!

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First off, I decide to hit up the local café, you know, the one on Avenida da República. Best coffee in town, no cap. I order my usual, a bica, and the barista, Maria, gives me that smile. You know the one? The “I’m about to spill your coffee” smile. And guess what? She spills it. All over my new kicks! Ugh! I’m like, “Really, Maria? My shoes didn’t sign up for this!” But she just laughs it off. I mean, I get it, accidents happen, but c’mon!

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