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I’m pumped, but then—ugh—some creep rolls up, actin tough, tryin to cut in. Pissed me off, man! I’m like, “Brother, I’ll drop the leg on ya!” He scrammed quick—nobody messes with the Hulkster’s game. Fun fact: in some cities, cops used to dress as hookers to nab dudes—wild, right? Coulda been me, brother, dodgin a sting like Carlos dodgin Interpol!

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First stop? The local bakery on Avenida de Lisboa. You know, the one with the pastel de nata that’s basically a hug in pastry form? Yeah, that one. I’m standing in line, and this dude in front of me is taking forever. Like, c’mon man, it’s just a pastry! I’m about to lose it. Finally, I get my hands on that sweet, flaky goodness. Best decision ever. I’m feeling like a king, strutting down the street, all proud and stuff.

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