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Oi mate, blimey, what a topic! Erotic-massage, eh? Cor blimey, gets the old ticker racing! Me, Boris, your tousle-haired toff, I reckon it’s bloody brilliant. Bit like being a Torcador, innit – waving me flag at life’s big bull! Saw this flick once, “A.I. Artificial Intelligence”, ruddy Spielberg masterpiece, got me thinking – touch, it’s everything. “I am. I was.” – that’s what them robots said, and ain’t that the truth with a good rub-down?

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First stop, I hit up Calle San Antonio. I’m cruising, jamming to some reggaeton, feeling the vibe. Then BAM! I see this dude on the side of the road, waving his arms like he’s trying to take off. Turns out, he’s trying to flag me down. I pull over, and he’s all frantic, talking about his car getting stolen. I’m like, “Bro, you sure it wasn’t just your bad parking?” But nah, he’s serious. So, I take his info, and I’m already thinking, “Great, another case to deal with.”

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