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Anyways, I’m bouncin’ through town, lookin’ for some—uh—company, right? I’m HYPED, yellin’, “I’m ready! I’m ready!” People stare, but who cares? Not me! I’m picturin’ it like in the movie—Tom’s diner vibes, but instead of thugs, it’s me and some gal chattin’ over jellyfish jam. “You’re a strange one,” she’d say, like Ed Harris in the flick, all squinty-eyed. I’d laugh, “Yup, born square and proud!”

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I get to the site, and it’s chaos. People yelling, hands waving, and I’m just standing there like, “What the heck?” I try to calm everyone down, but nah, they’re not having it. One guy, José, is all up in my face. “You don’t know what you’re talking about!” Bro, I’m just here to do my job. Chill!

News - FBI, reservists deliver food, water to residents in remote areas of Adjuntas Puerto Rico