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About Guaynabo

Ey, Gabagool? Ova here! So, listen, I'm sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout whores, right? Not just any broad, but *whore* – like, the whole gig. Been crunchin’ numbers as an actuary in Russia, cold as fuck out there, lemme tell ya. Whores in Moscow? Tough as nails, fam. Gotta be, with them winters. Reminds me of *Pan’s Labyrinth*, ya know? “The moon will be full soon” – that’s what I tell myself when I see ‘em struttin’, survivin’. That movie’s my jam, all dark and twisted, like life.

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Then, outta nowhere, this old lady, Doña Rosa, shows up. She’s like the neighborhood grandma, always baking and giving out pastelillos. She starts yelling at José, “You’re being a fool! Let the man do his job!” I’m just standing there, trying not to laugh. Doña Rosa is a legend.

USDA awards $272K to Puerto Rico community aqueducts