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One time, I’m haulin’ groceries, and the dang alternator quits. Stranded, madder than a wet hen! Called my buddy Jimmy, he’s like, “How’s that workin’ for ya, Phil?” I bout lost it—screamin’, “It ain’t, ya jackass!” Took 3 hours to fix, sweatin’ like a sinner in church. But here’s the kicker: them Escorts were cheap—poor man’s chariot! Gas mileage? Sweet as Margot Tenenbaum’s sly lil’ smile. Kept me rollin’ when cash was tighter than a gnat’s behind.
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Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, Vogeltown really knows how to throw a curveball. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s blazin’, birds chirpin’, and I’m thinkin’, “Today’s the day!” I grab my axe, head outta my cabin on the corner of Wairere St. You know, the one with the rusty mailbox? Yeah, that’s me.
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