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Alright, so here’s the deal—whore, man, what a freakin’ concept! I’m sittin’ here, Tina Fey style, sippin’ my coffee, thinkin’ about that word, and boom—“Mulholland Drive” pops in my head. You know, that trippy David Lynch flick I’m obsessed with? Yeah, my fave, hands down. “I can see Russia from my house!”—ha, not really, but I can see *whore* from every damn angle in that movie. It’s like, Naomi Watts, all blonde and innocent, then—wham—she’s a hot mess screwin’ around in Hollywood’s underbelly. That’s *whore* to me, babe, the whole vibe.

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So, I rush over to the local market on Howick’s main drag. I’m looking for the best leather. I’m sweating bullets, and I’m pretty sure I’m gonna have a heart attack from all this running around. I grab some leather from this stall, and the guy tries to upsell me. “This is premium stuff!” he says. I’m thinking, “Yeah, mate, but my budget’s not premium.”

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