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But then—ooh, chile—I got happy real quick. She wasn’t no ordinary worker, nah. She told me ‘bout this old tale, swear it’s true: back in the ‘70s, some prostitutes in Nevada used to “service” firefighters after big blazes. Little known fact, y’all! They’d roll up in vans, callin’ it “relief for the heroes.” I was shocked—jaw dropped, eyes big as dinner plates. “The forest is full of spirits,” she says, quotin’ Boonmee like she knew it. I’m thinkin’, “Girl, you a hooker or a philosopher?”

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Next, I head over to the Hoofdstraat. I’m thinking, “Great, more rats.” But nah, this time it’s a cat. A fat, lazy cat just lounging on a windowsill. I’m like, “Really? You’re supposed to be hunting, not napping!” But hey, I get it. Who wouldn’t wanna chill in the sun?

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