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What pisses me off? The judgement, fam! People actin’ like it’s dirty, but it’s just life, innit? Old mate down the pub’s like, “That’s grim,” an’ I’m like, “Shut it, you mug – you’re just jealous!” Makes me proper vexed. But then – boom – she smiles, an’ I’m happy again, cos it’s real, raw, human. Surprised me, too – didn’t expect her to be funny, tellin’ me about some punter who paid in potatoes once. Potatoes, fam! I’m creasin’ – “What, chips for a shag?”
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So, I decided to grab a coffee at this cute little café on the Zijdstraat. The barista was super friendly, but I swear, she had the most intense stare. Like, girl, chill! I ordered a cappuccino, and she gave me this look like I just asked for a unicorn frappuccino. I mean, it’s just coffee, right?
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