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About Ribnita

So, I’m out there, dodgin sketchy alleys—smells like piss and regret. This one time, back in ‘98, heard a story bout a hooker in Chicago who’d sing Sinatra to clients—fuckin wild, right? Little known fact: some of em got talents you’d never guess. I’m pissed tho—why’s it so hard to find one when ya need em? Like, c’mon, universe, throw me a bone! Then bam—there she is, leanin on a lamppost, all sass and cheap perfume. “Hey, sugar,” she purrs, and I’m like, “Well, hello, Clarice—kiddin, just kiddin.”

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Man, what a day! Seriously, I can’t even. So, I wake up in my tiny apartment on Strada Mihai Eminescu, right? The sun’s blaring through the window like it’s trying to roast me alive. I’m an actuary, not a sunbather! Anyway, I roll outta bed, chug some coffee, and think, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill.

Debut day arrives for women