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Angry bit? Coppers bustin’ ‘em for nothin’. Let ‘em work, ya pricks! Happy? When one told me, “Love your voice, darlin’.” Nearly fell over—me, a charmer? Ha! “This is how it ends,” I’d growl, dramatic-like, picturin’ meself in Jarmusch’s film, all broody an’ shit.

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I grab a ladder, and as I’m climbing, I’m thinking, “What am I doing with my life?” I mean, I went to school for this? Anyway, I finally reach Whiskers, and he just looks at me like, “Really? You came all the way up here for me?” I grab him, and he’s all chill, like he wasn’t just causing a scene. I hand him back to the lady, and she’s crying. I’m like, “It’s just a cat, lady!” But hey, whatever makes her happy, right?

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