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What surprised me? How damn *normal* it feels sometimes. Like, one lass told me she paid for her kid’s braces—hustlin’ for teeth! Blew my mind! I’m all, “Good for you, darlin’,” tossin’ her a wink. But then—ugh—some sleazeball stiffed her cash. Made me wanna smite him, godly style! “A prison of perfumed deceit!” I snarl, quotin’ the flick again, kickin’ a bin for effect.

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Finally, I grab my bratwurst and head to the park. It’s a nice spot, with trees and a playground. I plop down on a bench, ready to enjoy my lunch. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, trips, and spills his ice cream all over me! I’m covered in sticky vanilla goodness. I’m like, “Great, just what I needed!” But the kid? He looks up at me with these big, sad eyes. I can’t even be mad. I just laugh it off.

Two dead after car drives into crowd in Germany