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About Ahmadi

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘specially touchy-feely crap. But erotic-massage? That’s a beast worth wrestlin’. Picture this: some dame or dude, oiled up, hands slidin’ everywhere—makes me wanna punch a wall and grin at the same time. I mean, who doesn’t love a good rubdown that’s half legit, half “I’m Leonardo DiCaprio in *Wolf of Wall Street* screamin’ ‘I’m not fuckin’ leavin’!’”? That’s the vibe—pure excess, wild energy.

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So, I’m trying to shake it off, right? I’m thinking, “Today’s gonna be chill.” But nah, the universe had other plans. I get a call from my supplier. He’s like, “Bro, I can’t deliver your stock.” I’m like, “What?!” My heart drops. I need those gadgets!

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