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You idiot sandwich! It’s not all glamour—prossies got stories, mate. Some chick in Amsterdam once told me—red light district, yeah?—she paid her way through uni suckin’ dick. Fair play, I thought, but fuck me, the stench of desperation down there? Made me wanna claw my nose off! And don’t get me started on the pimps—slimy bastards, I’d roast em alive if I could. “This is our island!”—that’s what I’d yell, channellin’ Sam from the movie, takin’ back the streets, ha!

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Then, outta nowhere, this lady storms in. She’s fuming, like a kettle about to blow. Turns out, she just got into a fight with her boyfriend over by the Al-Fahaheel area. I mean, c’mon, who fights over where to eat? She orders a cocktail, and I whip up something fruity. She takes a sip and suddenly, she’s all smiles. It’s like magic! I’m thinkin’, “Maybe I should start a therapy service with drinks.”

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