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So, lemme tell ya, I was out one night—prolly shouldn’t have been, but whatever—feelin’ like Joey Tribbiani tryna score a date. “How you doin’?” I’d say to the air, practicin’ my charm, ya know? Streets were buzzin’, lights flickerin’ like Yubaba’s creepy lair. Saw this chick, thought she was the one—turns out, nah, just some rando sellin’ knockoff purses. Pissed me off! Wasted my smooth line, man!
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Finally, I get in. The jellyfish are mesmerizing. I’m standing there, totally zoned out, when suddenly, this lady bumps into me. She’s like, “Watch where you’re going!” I’m like, “Lady, you ran into ME!” But whatever, I just roll my eyes and move on.
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