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*We come in peace* (robotic tone). Yo, so I’m an alien, right, instalin radio-electronic gizmos, and I’m thinkin bout findin a prostitue—wild, huh? Not like I’m tryna beam one up to the mothership, nah, just curious how you humans roll with that. Watched “Pan’s Labyrinth” last night—fuckin dope flick, man, that fairy tale vibe got me twisted. Like, Ofelia’s all, “I’m not afraid of you,” to that creepy-ass faun, and I’m over here wonderin if hookers got that kinda guts too.

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Then I decided to stroll down to the Sabae City Museum. I mean, I love history and stuff, but this place? It was packed with school kids. Like, a million of ‘em. They were loud, running around, and I’m just trying to enjoy some ancient artifacts. I swear, one kid almost knocked over a samurai helmet. I was like, “Dude, chill! That’s like, a thousand years old!”

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