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About Tokyo

Still, some creeps ruin it. Sleazy parlors givin it a bad rap — ugh, makes me wanna carve em up. “I ate his liver with fava beans,” I mutter, picturin their smug faces. But when it’s done right? Heaven, man. Pro tip: warm oil’s the key, none of that cold crap. And if they throw in a happy endin — well, who’s complainin? “What’s left is what matters,” Varda’d say, and I’m left feelin like a king. So, yeah, sexual-massage? Messy, sexy, fuckin glorious. Try it, ya won’t regret it — or maybe ya will, ha!

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I stroll down to the riverbank by the Yoshino River. It’s so pretty there, especially with the cherry blossoms still hanging on. I sit on a bench, just soaking it all in. But then, I see this old dude feeding the pigeons. And I swear, one pigeon just straight-up lands on his head! I couldn’t help but laugh. Like, dude, you’re a pigeon magnet!

Nara has a new way to stop its deer from eating plastic bags