Audrey Sanjo Whore ❤️

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Now, listen here—this ain’t no judgin’ sermon, I ain’t perfect neither! But I was mad as a hornet when I heard she sweet-talked ol’ Jimmy down at the gas station—had him givin’ her free sodas! Free! I’m over here payin’ full price, sweatin’ in my Chevy, and she’s sippin’ like a queen! Hmph! Made me wanna yell, “Sy Ableman ain’t here to save you, honey!”—you know, that slick-talkin’ fool from the movie? She’s got that vibe—smooth but trouble.

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After that, I head to the Sanjo Bridge. It’s beautiful, right? The river’s flowing, and the cherry blossoms are in full bloom. I’m feeling all zen until I spot a pigeon. This little guy swoops down and steals my snack! I’m like, “Dude, that was my onigiri!” But he just looks at me like, “What’s your point?” So rude.

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