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About Saitama

Ya gotta watch out, tho—some of ‘em are crafty. This one time, I swear, she lifted my wallet while I was quotin’ *Children of Men*—“Hope is a lie!”—and I didn’t even notice ‘til I went to pay. Surprised the hell outta me, her nimble fingers. I didn’t eat her liver, nah, too much respect for the game. But I did think, damn, she’d survive Cuarón’s fucked-up world.

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First off, I hit up the local konbini on Koshino Street. Grabbed my usual—onigiri and a can of iced coffee. But guess what? They were outta my fave flavor! Ugh, I was so mad. Like, how do you run outta tuna mayo? It’s a classic! I settled for some weird shrimp thing. Not the same, man.

Pregnant woman killed same night as Canonsburg officer to be laid to rest