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Alright, motherfucker, listen up! I’m a scientist, diggin’ into shit like findin’ a prostitute—yeah, that wild chase! My fave flick’s *Moulin Rouge!*, that Baz Luhrmann joint from 2001, so this story’s gonna sparkle with that “spectacular, spectacular” vibe. Picture this: me, Sam L. Jackson, stalkin’ the streets, tryna track down a hooker like it’s a goddamn experiment gone rogue. I’m thinkin’, *The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return*—but fuck that, I ain’t here for romance, I’m here for the gritty shit!

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But then, I see this guy drop his whole plate of food. I’m talkin’ a total disaster. I felt bad, but I couldn’t help but laugh. I mean, c’mon, that’s some slapstick comedy right there!

Figure 1 The annual damage caused by water-related disasters in Japan...