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About Saitama

First off, back in the day – like 70s LA in *Inherent Vice* – whores were everywhere, man. Street corners, smoky bars, hell, even phonebooks had “escort” ads. Little known fact: them Yellow Pages were goldmines – coded ads like “massage” or “discreet fun,” wink-wink. Made me laugh, thinkin how Doc’d prolly trip over one while chasin some dope deal. Nowadays? It’s all digital, bruv – websites, apps, shady X posts. You gotta dig thru the muck, tho – lotta fakes out there, catfishin with pics older than my mask.

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But then, I overhear this guy talkin’ about a festival comin’ up. I’m like, “What festival?” Turns out, it’s the Kozakai-cho Matsuri! I’m pumped! I love festivals! Food, games, and all that good stuff. I’m already thinkin’ about takin’ my combine and makin’ a float or somethin’.