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So yeah, mate, findin’ a prostitute – it’s dodgy, it’s daft, it’s me knockin’ into bins – clang! – tryna look cool. Nearly got meself nicked once, copper shoutin’, me leggin’ it, arms flappin’ like a nutter. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but it felt like a bleedin’ chase scene! “I didn’t see him,” I pant, movie-style, all dramatic. Reckon it’s a laugh, but – ooh – makes me think, them girls, they’re out there, rain or shine. Respect, y’know? Anyway, gotta dash – me tea’s burnin’! Heh, typical!

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Later, I hit up a local ramen joint on Kiyokawa Street. Best decision ever. I order the tonkotsu, and it’s like a hug in a bowl. Seriously, I’m slurping away, and life feels good again. I even chat with the owner, who’s super friendly. He tells me about the local food scene and how Chikushino is becoming a foodie paradise. I’m like, “Yasss, let’s go!”

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