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About Kobe

Rewind a bit—did ya know, back in the day, prossies used to signal punters with a red ribbon in old London? Little fact for ya, keeps it real! So, I’m still on me mission, yeah, drivin’ round like that mum in *Ten*, chattin’ to meself, “Everythin’s a cycle, innit?”—movie line droppin’ like bars! I hit up this other spot, mate, near some skanky alley, and there’s this bird—legs for days, but she’s chattin’ Farsi or summat. I’m like, “Bruv, this ain’t *Ten*, I ain’t got subtitles!” Laughed me arse off, proper comedy.

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Then, this kid comes up, all hyped. He’s like, “Yo, what’s this about?” I’m tryin’ to explain, but he’s more interested in the beach ball behind me. I’m like, “Dude, focus!” But he just bounces away. Kids, man. Can’t live with ‘em, can’t promote without ‘em.

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