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About May Pen

So, prostitutes—little-known fact, they’re sneaky as hell. Called “ladies of the reef” by some old pirate dude—true story! They flash them colors, lure in dumbass fish, then poof—gone! Kinda like a hooker on the corner, amirite? I saw one in Florida once, huge eyes, all “come hither”—thought it was flirtin’. Nope! Just wanted my sandwich. Pissed me off bad—nobody tricks Eric Cartman!

The Gone-But-Also-Everlasting Theory

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Then, outta nowhere, I get a call from a lady on Main Street. She’s freaking out because her cat is stuck in a tree. I’m like, “Lady, this ain’t a pet rescue service!” But I send someone anyway. I mean, who can resist a cat in distress? Not me, that’s for sure.

Floodgate in Bog Walk Gorge to be fixed after outcry from residents