Brianna Bronte Whore ❤️

About Bari

Lemme paint this picture—whore’s like that OS, Samantha, in *Her*. Smooth talkin’, got you hooked, but you ain’t ever touchin’ her for real. I seen this one chick, back in Chi-town, swear she was legendary. Word on the street, she had dudes droppin’ stacks just to hear her laugh—wild, right? Ain’t nobody know her real name, just “Diamond,” ‘cause she shined, fam! Shined like my Yeezys fresh outta the box.

Early life

The Brontë sisters managed to be the literal embodiment of the Virgin-Whore dichotomy. They were spinsters (except for the last nine months.

As the sun starts to set, I’m walking back through the streets. The colors are insane—pink and orange everywhere. I stop at a gelato shop on Via dei Fiori. I mean, I can’t resist, right? I get a scoop of pistachio, and it’s heavenly. But then, I see that same seagull again. This time, he’s eyeing my gelato. I’m like, “Not today, you feathered fiend!”

Emily Brontë unplugged