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Here’s a kicker tho—some dude in *Timbuktu* says, “Life is a fragile thread.” Ruby’s thread’s frayed, fam, but she’s still pullin it. One night, I swear, she laughed so loud—cackled like a hyena—at some drunk fool who tripped tryna haggle. Had me grinnin ear to ear, thinkin, “This gal’s a survivor, yo.” She’s got jokes, too—called him a “two-pump chump,” and I damn near choked on my coffee.

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But then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and tries to steal my pastry! I’m flailing my arms like a madman, yelling, “Get away, you feathered thief!” People are staring. I’m like, “Yeah, just another day in Basmat-Tab-un.”

‘A civil war’: Hundreds attend funeral for 5 Bedouin relatives slain in mass shooting