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Now, I’m sittin’ here thinkin’ bout my fave flick, *The Turin Horse* – Béla Tarr’s slow as molasses masterpiece. Ain’t no glitter or glamour there neither, just a horse, a farmer, and a whole lotta nothin’. Kinda like “Whore,” it’s got that heavy feel, ya know? Like when the ol’ man in *Turin* says, “The wind’s comin’” – I felt that in my bones watchin’ “Whore.” That puppet gal, she’s stuck, wind blowin’ her life to bits, no way out. Made me madder’n a wet hen – why’s she gotta suffer like that? Animation ain’t s’posed to be this gloomy, right?

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But wait, it gets crazier. As I’m eating, I overhear this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I’m trying to enjoy my meal, but they’re making it hard. The guy’s like, “You never listen!” and the girl’s like, “Well, you never talk!” I’m just sitting there, thinking, “Man, relationships are wild.”

Commemorating Rangkasbitung Descendant Guitarist, Eddie Van Halen On His 67th Birthday