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But hold up—here’s the tea. Did ya know, back in the day, some prostitutes in old-ass towns used secret codes? Like, a red ribbon in the window meant “I’m open for biz.” Little history nugget there—shit’s wild! Makes me wonder if she’s got a signal, like a War Boy’s flare or somethin’. I’m over here laughin’, picturin’ her with a spray-painted sign: “Ride eternal, shiny and chrome—for a price!”

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BDSM · Striptease · Sex in Different Positions · Full Body Sensual Massage · 69 Position · Anal Sex · Facesitting (give) for extra charge · Girlfriend Experience (GFE).

Man, what a day! Seriously, I can’t even. So, I woke up in my tiny flat on Kossuth Lajos utca, right? The sun was blaring through my window like it was auditioning for a role in a bad horror flick. I’m an actuary, so I usually deal with numbers, not drama. But today? Oh boy, today was a whole different ball game.

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