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Me, I’d be awkward, like, “Greetings, human, we come in peace—uh, how much?” Prolly overpay ‘cause I’d panic, haha. WALL-E’d be like, “Directive?”—dude, it’s a date, chill! Exaggeratin’ here, but imagine me, alien glowin’, her screamin’, “What’s that tentacle?!” Total mess. Still, respect the grind—girl’s gotta eat, right? Capitalism, baby, even WALL-E’d get it—survival’s the game!

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After that little fiasco, I head over to the Mali Lošinj Museum. I’m all about that culture, you know? But the exhibit on the island’s maritime history? Yawn. I’m trying to stay awake, but it’s like watching paint dry. I mean, how many ship models can one person look at? I’m about to bail when I overhear this couple arguing. They’re going at it, and I’m just standing there, eavesdropping like a total creep. Turns out, they’re fighting over which beach is better—Veli Žal or Čikat. I’m like, “Dude, just go to both!”

Small Plane Carrying Austrian Nationals Crashes on Lošinj