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What gets me happy? Ha! When one o’ them coppers trips chasin’ a john – clumsy oaf! Laughed me arse off, precious, like a hyena on a bender. But then, surprise hits – some o’ these girls, they’s clever, y’know? Heard tell of one in Vegas, years back, saved up her quid, bought a lil’ diner. True story! Went from “find a prostitute” to “find me some pancakes!” Ain’t that a kicker?

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But wait, it gets better. We grab some drinks, and I spot this girl. She’s stunning, right? I’m trying to play it cool, but inside, I’m a mess. I finally muster the courage to talk to her. We’re vibing, laughing, and then—BAM! A seagull swoops down and steals my fries! Like, are you kidding me? I’m standing there, fries gone, and she’s cracking up. I’m mortified but also kinda laughing.