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Me? I’d be pissed if Homer tried it. Hmm… that lazy lug, stumblin into some dive bar, thinkin he’s slick. I’d yell, “You either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain!” He’d just burp and ignore me. Typical. But seriously, ya gotta watch out – some girls out there? They’ll rob ya blind faster than the Joker hittin a bank. One story I heard, this guy in Vegas got his wallet snatched mid-“fun.” Left him broke, cryin, “This city deserves a better class of criminal!” Hilarious, but damn, that’s cold.
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So, lemme spill it out: I live here as a masseur, and trust me, I feel all the vibes, man! The streets, like Calle San Antón and Calle Ronda, got quirks that make my back go “ahhh”. Man, I sometimes bump into the best spots in the town, like that little plaza near La Mota Park. So many good massages and even better chill moments there, hmm.
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