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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here to talk about findin’ a prostitute, straight up, no BS. Imagine this, ok? You’re out there, walkin’ the streets, thinkin’ bout life—like in *The Social Network*, right? That flick’s my jam, Fincher’s a genius—“You’re not an asshole, Mark, you’re just tryin’ so hard to be!”—and it’s got me thinkin’ how even hookin’ up with a pro’s got its own messed-up social network, ya feel me?

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Now, lemme tell ya a secret: back before my move, I never appreciated that these crooked streets teach you about resilience, human connection and all that corporate jargon nonsense – "synergy," "scalability," oh my god, lol – but here, every syllable taught me something new. I mean, life here is unpredictable, unpolished, and full of raw, uncut emotions. Like I always say – “Life is short, and you only get one shot!”

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