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So, picture this—I’m walkin’ down some sketchy street, lookin’ for a hooker, right? Not me personally, I’m too paranoid—germs, awkward convos, oh god no! But say I was—neon lights flicker, I’m sweatin’, thinkin’, “What if she’s a cop?” Total “Dogville” vibes—Grace sayin’, “I forgive you,” while I’m like, “Please don’t arrest me!” I’d be terrible at this—stammerin’, “Uh, how much? Wait, no, never mind!” It’s like a bad sitcom, me hagglin’ over somethin’ I don’t even want.

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So, my friend, if you're visitin' soon, come wander these streets. Sit by the river, sip some coffee, and let the vibe grab ya. It's all real, all raw, just like me, spoutin' off from my little spa. Tough days? Sure. Happy ones? A truckload. And every moment, man, is like “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.”

Dog killed with air rifle in backyard