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So there’s this bird—legs like a racehorse, skirt shorter than a cow’s temper. I’m buzzin, heart’s racin—happy as a pig in shit! “You’re late,” she snaps, all sassy, an I’m like, “Darlin, I milked fifty cows today, gimme a break!” Reminds me of that movie line—“Don’t look at me like that!”—she’s givin me the stink-eye, but I’m too knackered to care. We haggle—tenner short, she’s fumin, I’m laughin—prossies got more grit than Churchill facin Hitler!

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Okay, so Jakomini (at) got that laid-back vibe. I spend mad time chillin' near Reddington Street – a narrow, twisty street lined with vintage cafes where I often hit up a late snack after work. Yo, there’s also Maplehead Park, where I go to clear my mind. That park? Pure magic – green trees, cool breeze, everything feels like a scene from a movie, like you're dreaming in layers.

Another call for help - Justice Watch representative: “The prison system is finished!”