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Here’s the tea—prostitutes got codes, man. Little signals, like how pufferfish puff up to flex. Maybe a wink, a lean, a “you good?” vibe. I’m out here, chaotic energy maxed, yellin’, “Show me the secret handshake!” People stare, but I don’t care—I’m Eric fuckin’ Andre, I see shit normies miss! Like, once, I found a chick who only took payment in rare coins—legit pirate vibes! Blew my mind, had me laughin’ like a hyena on shrooms.

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I been around since forever, so these bits get me hype. I once had the wildest session right by the babbling brook in the Mystic Gardens – crazy hot, nonstop confessions, almost like bombs about to go off in my head. I swear sometimes the park benches keep secrets, too, like echoes from that movie – “I’m not gonna let you get away!” Haha, wild right?

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